Chapter 08: Year of Longing


Well,the time flew by at work after we got back from our little adventure in Louisiana.

 I constantly thought about the blonde, curvy woman from Starbucks. 

Sookie was on my mind 24/7 and it did not let up just because I was busy taping the rest of season two of “Blood Moon”. 

We had about 8 episodes completed before we went to the Louisiana’s meet and greet, but we needed to make sure we finished up the last 4 episodes by Christmas.  If we worked hard, we could get most of it done and that would only leave short outtakes to be done in December. 

My drive to get this accomplished was quickly getting on the rest of the cast’s nerves.

 Alcide approached me a couple of times and told me, “Dude, you need to chill out; you are scaring the rest of the cast.”

 I knew everyone was tired; we always got that way at the end of the taping season.

Tough Shit.

We had work to do.

I wanted to have fun too…….I played practical jokes like the rest of the team but I wanted to get these last four episodes out of the way quickly.

 I was a perfectionist and my drive for it upset a lot of people; I really didn’t care…We had a job to do, the quicker we wrapped it up the quicker we could do other things…. Like vacation, visit family, make movies…..

 It was a vicious cycle…. But we loved it; otherwise we would not have become actors.

As taping started to wind down, Thanksgiving was approaching and I was scheduled to go with Alcide to his parent’s home.

 I couldn’t make up my mind if I wanted to go or not.   I did not want to upset Alcide’s parents with my attitude, it sucked and I was a downer most of the time.

 I was not very pleasant lately, I became a bear on the set and the only thing I could figure out after talking with Alcide is that I was disappointed I did not get to talk to Sookie before we left.  She was all I ever thought about…..That woman had bewitched me and it was driving me insane. 

Hell, my normal booty calls did not even want to be near me anymore.

 I craved this woman and I did not know how to give my heart and mind a fix to make the anxiety go away….

Shit I did not even know her last name so how was I suppose to get in contact with her?  

Shit! Shit! Shit!

So I talked it over with Alcide and we decided it was best for me to go home with him for Thanksgiving so we could take a drive by LSU and see if we could find her; maybe even talk to that Detective and see if he could give us some pertinent information of her whereabouts. 

It was a long shot, but it was the only shot I had.

I was so desperate at that point, I felt like a fucking hormonal teenager.

But of course work got in the way, and Alcide and I never made it to Shreveport.

 If we did not stay behind and finish up the accidentally deleted scenes then we would be working over the Christmas holiday and I was not having that. 

Shooting was a nightmare, no one wanted to be there.  It took us longer to reshoot these five scenes than an entire episode.

 What a waste of fucking time.

I was pissed that I could not get to Shreveport.  I wanted to find this girl.  I needed to find this girl.

Damn, why was this not in the cards for me?

Well, things wrapped up before the holidays and I decided to go see my step-mom in Sweden (but I call her mom).  I had not been in over a year and I needed to relax.  Maybe the time away and I would start to forget about this girl.

 Like hell, I was hooked!

I started to feel this odd pull a couple of times a day.  It felt like I was supposed to hear something but no one was ever around.  I had felt it in LA but I figured I was strung out from the end of year rush.  I felt it at about 5pm and then again in the morning.  Sometimes I was sleeping, so I figured it was just a lack of sleep.  But then it started again in Sweden, about 6am and then again at 3pm.

 It was an odd feeling but I acknowledged it after a while and just smiled at the feeling.   The only way to describe it was it made me feel warm in my heart. 

My mom had caught me a couple of times smiling like a goon.  She asked me what was up and I told her about the odd feeling. 

She said, “Eric, sweetie, someone out there loves you with all their heart and is wishing you well.  You are feeling the residual effects from it.  The old Norse women would say you are feeling the call of your soul mate.”

I just smiled….. MY soul mate…… who the hell was that…… and how the hell was I suppose to figure out where she lived…….. Damn it…..

I asked mom, “Do you have any clues on how I figure out who it is and where they are located?”

Mom just smiled and said, “Sweetie, you may never find your soul mate.  You may cross paths many times but you may never meet.  Or you may know one another but do not know of the other’s feelings.  It is a tangled web and usually left to the FATES to decide who will be the winner.”

I just looked at her, my mouth open wide and shook my head. 

My mom, I love her to death but she confuses the shit out of me sometimes.  I guess being a doctor you look at things differently.

So I decided we were talking about girls and stuff so I could broach the subject of Sookie with her. 

So I began to tell her about the girl I met at Starbucks.  About the sweetness she carried on her shoulders and how I could not stop thinking about her.   I told my mom I felt doomed…….  I asked her for suggestions….

She asked me a few questions about Sookie and that would help me figure out what my next step would be.

“How often do you think about her?”

“Why did you leave it up to Bobby to get her name?”

“Why hadn’t I called the Detective to find out more about the case?”

“Why did I not get Alcide’s sister to help out, you had a picture after the event, she may  know her?”

“Did I think she would want to date an actor?”

“Did I think she reciprocated my feeling?”

“When I felt the pull, what time was it in LA and then what time did I think it happened here in Sweden?” 

She said, “Since I have only felt the pull since after meeting Sookie, I needed to figure out if the time synced up to Louisiana time. I might just have met my soul mate and time would be on my side if I figured it out.”

But she warned, “Don’t push it, if you are meant to meet, let it happen naturally.  You could cause damage to both your hearts if you push or pursue.” 

I asked what she meant by that last statement?

“If you push, it could hurt the relationship.  Always know it is there in the back of your mind. When the time is right you will know it…. Still look into who she is, find out her name but be patient, if she is the one who was being stalked in Baton Rouge, she could run from you if she thinks she is being stalked again.”

“Be patient, take your time; your heart will let you know when it is time.”

So I let her know my responses to her questions.

 “ALL the DAMN time.

 “Because it was part of his damn job to do this kind of stuff for the actors.”

 “Felicia had been in contact with him and he said the trial was delayed by back log.  I would probably only be needed for a deposition and I could do that by tele-conference when the trail neared. “

 “Damn it, I forgot I even had it while we were there, I was too busy throwing a pity party at the time.”

 “Have no clue; she didn’t even know who I was or even who Alcide was and she was there to see him kind of.”

At the time, YES, HELL YES, she was just as flustered as I was, like two peas in a pod.  We were smiling, smirking, blushing or waving.  Yes I think she felt the same jolt as I did.”

 “In LA I thought it happened at about 5 or 6pm which would make it 8 or 9pm in Louisiana and then at 4 or 5am in the morning which would make it 7 or 8am in Louisiana.  As for here in Sweden that one is tricky, 6am here would be 10pm there and then again around 3pm which would be 9am there, if I am calculating it correctly.   I think I am a bit off because the times would not match up to the LA times.  But I guess I am over thinking it.” 

“It’s all pretty close in time and it started happening right after my trip…  Maybe it is Sookie and she talks to me.  Should I dare hope that is what she is doing or just let it slide away and let the chips fall where they may?”

Mom said to chill out and not over think it…. I’d figure it out soon enough but to enjoy my vacation before I have to get to the location site of my next movie.

 I had a month before I needed to be there. 

My time with my mom went by quickly.   It felt like one minute I was just getting there to relax and the next I was jutting off to Hawaii for my location shoot.   I was looking forward to it; maybe my mind would be off Sookie while I did the filming of my next movie.  Who was I kidding, I was screwed, this woman was on my mind 24/7.  She is all I ever thought about.  

When I arrived in Hawaii, I found out Alcide would be there too for a small part in the same movie apparently one of the original cast members had to back out and he was available.  He brought his current girlfriend with him.  He met her in Canada, she was a sweet girl and they got along well but he had yet to take her home to meet the family, her name was Angela.   He called her his angel and he thought that she may be the one, they were inseparable.  She even quit her government job to be with him…. They were determined to make this work.  The paparazzi hounded her constantly to get dirt on him and his family but she never budged.   I think she was a keeper for him… I just wish I could find someone like this for me.

The three months we were to spend in Hawaii turned into four long months.  I was glad Alcide and Angela were there to remind me to get my head out of my ass.  I was miserable but a professional so I knew I could not let the movie down even if I was emotionally distraught.

I was looking forward to getting back to normalcy.   I was actually looking forward to the next season taping of “Blood Moon”.  I heard we were going to be doing a location shoot and one of the places they spoke about was Shreveport so I was looking forward to a visit with Alcide’s parents.  Plus we would be close enough to LSU to go take a look.  That is if we had the time.    But there was still another three months before taping started so I figured I needed to get away.  Find peace and solace.  Where the hell could I go and not be noticed and enjoy my time?  Maybe forget about her.

 I was so lost.   I chose to go back to Sweden because I could blend in and after a month my mom ordered me to go to the Caribbean and have fun.  Blend in with the tourists and maybe find a girl to help me forget about Sookie for a little while. 

Well I took her advice, found a nice girl or so I thought.   She was an upcoming TV star and she knew the pain of the paparazzi.  I figured out too late that she was another fame hound who latched onto me and made me miserable.  She was good for sex; hell Dawn could give a great blow job but when she screamed out someone else’s name during an orgasm, I was done. 

 Let me digress a bit.  We had a great time in the Caribbean, I found out she did not live to far away from me in LA so I figure it was a perfect match, and maybe I would forget about the blonde, curvy one.  Hell while I was in Sweden, I found enough blonde, blue eyed girls to remind me of Sookie while I had sex with them. Yes I was using them and it was a poor replacement but it was all I had. 

 So when I met Dawn Green, I thought my luck changed.  She was a brunette and I let the memory of Sookie slide as far back as possible in my mind.   It was when we got back to LA, I found out she was now a cast member, I had a rule not to date cast members but I figured we were dating before I knew it so I could get by the rule. I knew Sookie still lurked in the back of mind but I was feeling better, I wasn’t feeling lonely and desperate for her. . Dawn and I dated for about 4 months before I found out two things about her.

 One, she would call the paparazzi and let them know where we would be so her picture with me could be taken.  We were always on some rag magazine cover and I hated it; I loved my privacy.

Two, she called out someone else’s name during an orgasm, the first time she did it I thought I was mistaken but the second time, I knew it was over.  I could not have her calling out a co-worker’s name while she was having sex with me.  It was Mark Stonebrook and I hated that fucker. That happened in the second month of filming “Blood Moon” when we headed for Shreveport to do an on location shoot, it was actually the night before the extras were to be there.  

I hated all the extras milling about, most were gawkers but I dealt with that by avoidance, but three days of avoidance was not going to happen I would have to surface sooner or later.   Most of them were there for scenes as Alcide’s pack but a few would be for my nightclub.   

As I looked around on morning number one, as I was hiding out in the cherry picker on the outside stage, looking for extras for Fangtasia I thought I saw a glimpse of her, MY Sookie, but she moved away too quickly to really see her so I let it go.  But all the feelings came flooding back into my thoughts.

 It was then that Alcide came up to me and told me we were going on a double date that night.   He was hooking me up with another cast member, Isabel, so that I could get over Dawn… Little did he know I was over Dawn, like instantly; I was smitten by the thoughts of Sookie again.

So that night against my better judgment, I went out on a double date.  Hell there was no chemistry between us at all.  Izzie was fun but that was it. Not romance material and she agreed to that on her end as well.  My thoughts were distracted and the three of them realized it.  They all thought it was Dawn and when the girls left to go to the ladies room Alcide asked me what my deal was.

I told him about Dawn and what happened and why it was finally over….  I told him about the extras this morning and how I thought I saw Sookie and now that was all I could think about.  Alcide said he would keep an eye out with the extras he was assigned to to see if he saw a sexy blonde. He apologized for not being able to remember what she looked like but he would keep a heads up. 

So on day 2, I was actively looking for all things blonde, but I did not see her anywhere.  I was hoping my night scene at the club that evening would have her there. 

Who I was joking, why would she be in Shreveport when she went to school in Baton Rouge?

We started to shoot the dance scenes at Fangtasia and I saw her, it was my sweet Sookie.  She was dressed up in a mini skirt, short heels (3inches if I had to guess) and a mid-drift halter top.  She looked great, I wanted to run to her and throw my arms around her but I was told to stay in my seat and watch all the dancers. 

I was having a difficult time not moving but I watched her and the film crew caught onto the fact that I was watching someone and I was showing great amounts of lust.  You would have never been able to make that shit up.

 I was afraid I was drooling.

 The crew tried to figure out who I was watching and then they panned on Dawn (hell fucking NO) and moved all the extras further away from her so that was where my attention was drawn to.    Dawn smiled at me and I just growled which everyone thought was a great ad-lib.

HELL NO that woman made me want to barf!

 As the scene proceeded, the extras came back out and moved closer to me, I watched for Sookie and found her, she was dancing by herself but damn that girl could move.  If she had a pole and could wrap herself around it all of my fantasies would be hooked up and complete. 

As  Sookie approached me,  I saw her look up and smile at me and I think she said hello, I smirked back at her full FANG , she blushed that beautiful color of RED but ended up being pushed further back by the crew so they could bring Dawn back out closer to me.   After that, I lost track of her.

I was pissed. I needed her; I needed to talk to her… Shit FATE was at it again.

I heard a break called and I asked where the extras were taken.   No one seemed to know but half of them were asked to leave.

I found Alcide and told him what happened and he said he would go look for them.  I couldn’t lose the chance again, she was so close.  I needed to find her.   Alcide came back and said that most of the extras left and it was mainly crew left on the set now; we would have to wait until the morning to look for her again. 

Shit I needed a STIFF drink, like ASAP.  That never happened; I went back to hotel and folded into a deep sleep and dreamt of all things SOOKIE.

On day 3, neither of us saw her.   FUCK….. I lost the chance again.

We didn’t even make it to Alcide’s parent’s house while we were there.  Filming ran late and we were told we needed to get back to LA the following day so our little side trip was cut out. 

Damn it, what if she was my soul mate, what if the FATES were keeping us away from one another as a silly joke.   Fuck I couldn’t do this again…. I told Alcide come this Thanksgiving we WERE going to Shreveport and we WERE going to go to LSU and look for her….. Nothing was going to get in my way. 

But the one thing I held fast to was my morning and evening warm and fuzzy feelings, those never went away and I decided it was Sookie because while in Shreveport the times were synced up to the time we were currently at…. Now I just had to find her.  I called my mom and let her know about my find and my loss of all things Dawn fucking Green.


Authors note: In my mind Alcide never got a good look at Sookie when their picture was taken at Starbucks and the girl he saw at his parents’ house was just a friend of his sisters so he never made the connection.

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2 thoughts on “Chapter 08: Year of Longing

  1. Eric is “longing” for Sookie too!
    Everytime Eric thinks he will get a chance to go meet here her in Baton rouge…RL gets in the way!
    As you pointed out Alcide never gave a good look at Sookie that day at “Starbucks” with all those fans wanting photos and stuff so I guess when Alcide met Janice’s friend Sookie …he didn’t make the connection.

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