Author’ Note: Hello everyone, the previous chapter and this chapter were a bear to write. I know I will get a few of you whom are going to say, not in this lifetime, what direction are you headed in with Sookie, she is stupid, naïve and a basket case who needs to be put away but you have to keep in mind the following about our girl. People handle things differently and I think the way Sookie is handling things is from a young naive bubble induced world she grew up in. Besides we have to remember what she went through with Quinn and if you have ever been a victim of sexual or emotional abuse it can damage you psyche in unimaginable ways. She doesn’t know how to be any other way. Sure she is a bit of a fan girl sometimes (we all are) when it comes to Eric but she has a deeper connection to him that she truly doesn’t understand. So if she falls to pieces over it we need to think back to when we were growing up and had our first crushes or puppy love and what stupid things we did to make us feel better or get back at the one who spurned us. I am sure everyone is upset about the family and their accountability of not saying anything but sometimes its best to figure things out on your own and that is what I am focusing on in this story… Self awareness and self growth. MY Best Kristie
PS- I put a little lemon in here so don’t kill me if you don’t like it. It my first try.
Well the weeks went by in a blur for me. I tried desperately to concentrate on school but I could only think of my loss. I knew he was never mine to lose but it felt the same. The girl’s checked on a regular basis to see what the RAG magazines had to say. The reported back that there was nothing there but I knew better.
I decided to venture out on my own one afternoon and found what I was looking for. Right on the front page it said TV co-stars move in together and there was a picture of Eric and Pam. So right then and there I knew I had lost.
When I arrived back to the dorm it was Janice that found me crying. She asked me what was up and I told her what I saw but that I couldn’t read the article. She told me I should have read the article, because it was two people that moved in with Eric Northman not just Pam… I told her to show me.
There lies the dig she already had the magazine; she went to her room and brought back the very magazine I saw. She told me that they were all checking for me on what was up with Eric and Pam… They didn’t feel I needed to know that two cast members moved in with him. You couldn’t see who the other person was but you could tell he was male.
Janice told me to stop fretting. There was still the off chance he was still available as much as I was.
She said besides I still have to introduce you to my brother’s friend, so I needed to keep my options open. I told her I would and again told her that if a dating option came up I would do it. She chuckled and said will see about that.
The girls mentioned that they heard there was no planned Meet and Greets this year with the cast from “Blood Moon” so they found another option for us instead.
I full out bellied laughed, why on earth would we do that. The said for fun and it would kill an evening. Besides we might find the one, even Tara was willing to do it. So there we were sitting on a couch at the Hilton waiting to be led into the ballroom with the other 60 girls to try our hand at speed dating.
Well let me tell you, never again.
The men that show up to these things are off their rockers and skeeve. I shuttered when my first male approached me and it only got worse.
I was so thankful for the bell to ring. I couldn’t take sitting there much longer.
We had fifteen minutes left before we would be ushered out to wait to see if anyone wanted to match up with us. I knew right then and there I didn’t care if the girls found someone I was leaving even if I had to walk back to the dorm. Then my luck changed, not that I was interested in dating any of them but the next three guys were boring but entertaining it made that last few minutes go by quickly. Liam, just a big oaf of a guy with scary tattoos all over his neck, but he was trying to be sweet but it wasn’t happening in fact I was a bit scared, he made me laugh at least. Then there was Malcolm, greased back hair, shirt unbuttoned to his belly button… I couldn’t hear a thing he said all I could think of was the movie “Saturday Night Fever” when all the guys wore their shirts like that to be sexy. NOT He was a blur but at least he knew he wasn’t getting anywhere with me. Then came the piece of resistance, William Compton, yeah he had southern charm but what was up with his side burns, did he think he was in “Gone with the Wind” , he was so boring I almost fell asleep. All he could tell me about was his money and his boring computer job, Yuk I needed out of here fast. The bell rang and I excused myself and darted for the door, I didn’t want the chance of being knocked over by the stamped of woman trying to get out of that room…
WE all looked at one another after we gathered at the couches again and burst out laughing, we didn’t even communicate we all just grabbed each other’s hands and went out the front door together.
No looking back.
Okay chalk one up to experience, never going to happen again.
It was back to my classes, they were not the easiest, junior year was going to be a tough one. I was warned but I loved every minute of it.
My next experience at dating was just before our Thanksgiving break, Claudine’s brother came into town and she wanted me to give him a try. She thought we would be good for each other. Well let me tell you he was so full of himself and besides that he was GAY. He just agreed to the date because he wanted his sister to shut up. It’s not like I didn’t have fun, we both were checking out the males in the restaurant and Claude was giving me pointers on how to pick out a good one.
Well my mind slid back to the good one I had.
I missed him terribly but I knew we were in different worlds but how were we to ever meet again.
Would the FATES help us out? Sigh
I let Claudine know that the date went okay but she really needed to speak to her brother because he preferred men to woman. She just shook her head and said figures and she promised she would never try to hook me up with anyone ever again.
I was grateful for at least one of my friends not trying to set me up with a relative again.
Well the holidays were fast approaching and school was going along fabulously. I had the feeling of wonderlust and I was enjoying every minute of it.
I was looking forward to the two breaks we had ahead of us and being with my family. I knew we would be at the H’s for Thanksgiving and then half and half for Christmas but I didn’t care I missed them all. It didn’t even occur to me that the H’s might have guests along with Gran, me and Jason; I just wanted to be home for a little while with everyone.
When Janice and I arrived at the H’s for Thanksgiving there was a new SUV in the garage. I figured it was one of the friends that Dad always mentioned were always welcomed at their home.
It never occurred to me that Gran was sporting a new car.
As we walked in the kitchen we were greeted by hugs and kisses. Jason was even there, but he was on the phone talking to his new girlfriend.
I wonder when that happened.
I had so much to catch up on.
I heard Jason tell Pam that he would speak to her later and to tell Eric and Alcide that he said hello. He also said that it sucked that they couldn’t get away for the holiday but there was always Christmas.
Now that perked my interest, who was this Pam, Eric and Alcide?
The ones connected to the Herveaux’s?
I would have to find out soon. It was killing me…
Gran told us to get washed up and settled in so that we could have supper and then we would all sit in the living room to catch up. She had news to tell me and Janice.
It was a great dinner as always and we all gathered around the living room.
Gran smiled at us and told us she missed us but she wanted us to know what has been happening so if we happen to catch wind of it we would not be surprised or shocked.
“Well where do I start? Mitchell and I met when I was 16yrs old; it was love at first sight. We always knew after that we would be together forever.”
“Gran, I have heard this story already…. Be serious please, what do you have to tell us?”
“Alright child, so serious, well you know that I stayed here an extra two weeks after you two left for school?”
We both nodded YES.
“Well I meet my new grandbabies then?”
“Well here’s the thing baby girl, I have taken to calling Jackson and Sabrina my son and daughter- in- law as well as taken to calling Alcide and Janice my grandbabies.”
I nodded yes in understanding.
“Well, Alcide has two friends that come with him sometimes and after spending four weeks with them, I now call Pam and Eric my grandbabies too.”
“Wait a minute what four weeks, you were here for only two?”
“Oh child, I will get to that in a minute. As the first two weeks started to dwindle down and it was time to go home I told everyone I considered them to be a part of my family, you know you can never have enough family, and I would be honored if I could call them my grandbabies. Well they both accepted since neither of them has family besides us here in this room. It was kismet for me. I cherish all of you. Well I was only gone for a day and Eric called me up and asked if they could come spend a week or two at my home with me before they went back home. They did and we had a great time. It was during this time that Jason met his new girlfriend Pam and they have been talking ever since. However, it was also during this time that Eric and Alcide and Pam and Jackson and Sabrina became highhanded with me. “
“It was glorious Sook, they wouldn’t take NO for an answer; our Gran has sure met her match with all of them. I helped out where I could but it was mainly manual labor and some of the boys came over and helped out too.”
I just sat there and stared, what they hell were they trying to say?
“Jason honey, every bit counts and if all you can do is manual labor then so be it. Besides once the addition is done I figure I will have great grandbabies from you and Pam.”
What, well that got my attention!
“Oh child hush, let me explain. Between all of them, I now have a new driveway, new air conditioner, new SUV, new pool, new appliances, new mattress and freshly painted house inside and out.”
“Gran I think you forgot something.”
“No Jackson, I didn’t, the new addition to the house is not complete yet, so I can’t say I already have it. The rest is already there, finished, complete, installed and painted.”
“Gran are you telling me you are a kept woman?”
“No child, I am being spoiled by my grandbabies and child. Eric was the ring leader and I just sat back and let it happen. It felt good to be so relaxed and not have to worry about anything. I usually wouldn’t have allowed it but since I am getting up on my years and I was promised great grandbabies I was happy with the compromise.”
“Wait, who is giving you great grandbabies? Is someone pregnant?”
“No child, not yet but I am hopeful. I now have six grandbabies and I am hoping that sooner than later there will be little pitter patter of feet on my wood floor.”
“Gran I don’t know what to say… I am grateful for what they did but I don’t understand why.”
It was Dad that spoke up, “Sookie we all love your Gran, she has become an intricate part of all of our lives and we felt that since we could afford it we would make sure she lived out her golden years in a carefree fashion. No worries and only relaxed time on her hands.”
“But what will everyone think?”
“Child I don’t care, from the moment my grandbabies and son set foot in Bon temps everyone was aware of who they are and what they were doing for me. As far as everyone is concerned Jackson and Sabrina have four children, two dark haired who look like their daddy and two light haired that look like their momma. From what they know I gave birth to Jackson before your daddy and gave him up for adoption. Nobody needs to know the truth it is none of their damn business.”
Janice actually snickered. She shook her head and said sorry.
“But Gran you always told me to work hard for what I wanted and to take care of myself since I may not have anyone to fall back on.”
“Yes child that’s true but I had to rethink that argument. Eric is very persuasive.”
“But Gran” I was cut off.
“Sookie, I accepted these gifts and I would like you to be accepting of them too. They have truly made my life easier. I am sure there will be more to follow but we will have to wait and see. For now while my grandbabies are away I have a reprieve but I know when they visit again I am sure they will be up to no good.”
“Gran, How? Why? When?”
“Child, my new grandbabies will spend many months away from here but when they are here they will be able to enjoy a quiet life and spend time with me, Jackson and Sabrina. I look forward to their visits if even limited. As for how, we speak on the phone often. They tell me about their days and ask me for advice. They are never that far away just as you are not so far away in Baton Rouge. As for Why, we connected and I treated them as I do you and Jason and I grew to love them and vice versa. I think Pam is the worst off of the lot, she has been on her own since her teens years and the family foundation is keeping her grounded. Plus she met Jason through this and all is good there for now, sooner or later one of them will make the move to be with the other.”
I faced Jason and he was smiling like the Cheshire cat. I never saw him so happy.
What the Hell.
“As for when, whenever they find the time; Alcide, Eric and Pam are very busy people and when the time is right they will visit or be with us permanently. Only time will tell and the FATES will knit our family into a whole.”
“Okay for now, but I would really like to meet them. Will they be here for Thanksgiving? Christmas?”
Jason took this one, “Sook they are all too busy to make it home for the holiday but they are shooting for Christmas but that is even still up in the air. They will know more when it gets closer. I sure am hoping its Christmas or I am going to have to make a surprise visit out to where Pam lives. I miss her an awful lot.”
“Okay I will table it for now but I really want to meet them or talk to them.”
“Well hell Sook, you already know Alcide can’t you take his word on them?”
What the hell was Jason hiding?
What did he know?
He can’t keep a secret worth a hill of beans so I wonder what was up. I will think about it later, now I just wanted to spend time with my family.
On Thanksgiving the missing grandbabies called to say they wished they were here with us but work was getting in the way. They also let Gran and Jackson know that Christmas was looking like a big NO GO. I didn’t talk to them but I was given a HI by all of them from Gran. The phone call was a bit off since there were hushed tones sometimes, but I figured Gran or Dad were given them back private answers. I never pushed it because privacy is a big issue with the Herveaux’s and if Gran was giving advice I knew why there were hushed tones.
The next couple of days Janice and I hung out by the pool and talked about Gran’s house. Janice had never seen the old farmhouse before all the changes so she was looking forward to seeing the finished product. I told her at Christmas we would make a run so she could check it out.
We went back up to school the following day and we were looking forward to the next break in three weeks time. This break would be a bit longer, we would be able to relax because when we got back in January we would have mid terms and I was not looking forward to them, at all.
I became a bit melancholy while thinking about my future.
I know we had our dorm family but I was really starting to miss my regular family. It got me to thinking about after graduation and where I would be living and how much I was going to miss the H’s. I figured my invitation would be over then and I would just go back to Jason and Gran.
I started crying again and of course Janice found me once again.
I told her what was up and she assured me that the family dynamic was never going to change, that mom and dad loved the fact they had three more family members but the only difference was we had a different last name and that shouldn’t matter to me because it didn’t matter to them.
I wanted to tell her then and there that I knew about Alcide but I figured it was easier not to say anything. I didn’t know how uncomfortable she would get about the matter.
I started speculating on whom Eric and Pam were and if they were my Eric and his co-star from the show; that maybe the guy I saw in that picture months ago was Alcide and nobody wanted to tell me. The guy was pretty big but it was a really grainy picture. I would have to wait until Christmas break and see if I could learn anything else from everyone, maybe sneak into Eric’s room and check things out. I didn’t want to be the man standing alone in left field about this whole thing but I didn’t know how to ask anyone. I knew I could talk to Gran about it but if I was wrong and her Eric and Pam were someone else I would be breeching their privacy with her. I was an honorable person and did not want to do that besides I only had another week before we would be home again and then maybe I would glean some new information. Maybe Gran had pictures of her visit with the grandbabies and then I wouldn’t have to ask anyone I would learn the truth by myself.
It sounded like my only sound option and I was going to stick to my plan.
A week later we told our dorm mates we would see them in three weeks. I was excited to be going home and maybe meeting the mysterious grandbabies. But when we arrived home Mom let us now that work got in the way once again and they wouldn’t make it home until late January. I was upset but I had an alternate plan, I was going to sneak into Eric’s room, maybe even Pam’s. Hers would be easier to get into since it was on the third floor.
We were home for about three days and I got my chance to go into Pam’s room.
NOTHING! Absolutely NOTHING!
I was highly disappointed but I still had Eric’s room and I could try and do that now or hold off. I started for his room but got waylaid by Dad. He said he was looking for me to see if I wanted to run into town with him, Janice and Gran. I told him no I was good I wanted to take a nap, which I did want to do but after sneaking into Eric’s room.
He kissed my forehead and said he would see me later.
I hated being sneaky but I knew it would be easier than being blatant about it, I wasn’t a bold enough person just to walk in while everyone could catch me. I waited for the truck to leave and then made my way into his room. There really wasn’t much in there. I found shorts, wife beaters, underwear, Chucks Taylors, swim trunks but nothing personal. I guess he hadn’t had time to bring much in to leave behind.
Now what? I sat on the edge of his bed and wondered what my next move would be.
The bed was comfortable so I laid down and snuggled into the pillows.
They smelled wonderful; they smelled of a woodsy scent with a hint of the ocean in it. If this is what Eric smelt like in person I was a goner and would forget about my Eric for sure? I knew people told me I smelt like cherries and honey but I didn’t smell it so I wondered if Eric knew what he smelt like. I pondered for a bit and closed my eyes.
I must have fallen asleep because it was few hours later that I woke up to Dad calling my name and finding me in Eric’s bed curled up in a ball. I just smiled up at him and said hey with a smile on my face. It was then that I realized I was in the wrong room and Dad was smiling and shaking his head. I was a bit embarrassed, but I was embarrassed more by the fact that I had the most sensual dream about Eric and me in another man’s bed and I was woken up by my dad. EEWWWW.
Flashback to Dream
It looked like I was on the set of “Blood Moon” and there was this huge bed covered in furs up against the back wall.
I made my way towards it.
I looked around but no one was there so I climbed up in the middle of it hoping to take a nap. I was so tired and couldn’t keep my eyes open.
I didn’t’ know whose bed this belongs to but I was grateful for it none the less. I started to move my head around on the pillow and stretch and that’s when I felt like I was being stared at. I knew no one was in the room when I first arrived but I could feel someone hovering and watching.
I opened my eyes and looked up, it was Eric but it wasn’t my Eric it was Bastian from the show, yeah it’s who Eric plays on the show but this face above me had fangs and he was showing them to me, however for me he would always be my Eric.
I was nervous but I motioned for him to come closer, he wasn’t touching me but I could still feel the pressure of his body on mine. I was in heaven.
I reached up and gently placed my palm on his cheek; I slowly moved it down to his chin and caressed his face.
He sighed… they say on the show the fangs are a very sensual and intimate part of the vampire so I wanted to test the theory out.
I looked up at him and then moved my index figure to touch his fangs. I touched them every so lightly, but made sure to rub the fang slowly and softly front and back.
I felt a shiver resonate through his body and that’s when I pulled him down to my chest, I needed the pressure from his body on me, I longed for it.
I released a breath I didn’t think I was holding and sighed.
I had never been this close to Eric and my ladies bit were on fire.
I closed my eyes real quick and I heard him whisper…”Sookie look at me”…
I opened my eyes to see his beautiful blue eyes looking down on me with him resting his chest on mine but bracing himself with his hands.
I guess he didn’t want to crush me. But I needed the closeness I wanted him closer.
He smiled at me and said he had been waiting for me for a very long time.
I smiled back and told him I wanted him for a very long time.
He smiled at me and called me, “MY Sookie”.
It was nice to hear he wanted me too.
It was then that he asked permission with his eyes to move on with his touch.
All I could do was nod because I was in awe of this man. He was being gentle and sweet; nothing like I figured a vampire would be like.
As he messaged and kneaded my shoulder he caressed my neck with kisses, I felt his tongue and fangs on my pulse point. I pushed my neck up for him to bite me but he said, “NOT YET.”
I knew I was blushing; sex with Quinn was nothing like this even the heavy petting that we did. It was always feral, animalistic but I liked this is it was very erotic to me.
As Eric kissed down my clavicle I felt his hands starting to message my breasts, it felt wonderful… I moved my hands and put one in his hair and the other one on his back. I figured if he could roam and play so could I.
He continued to feather kiss down my neck and his hands started to move farther south.
I was nervous but I wanted this, I wanted Eric however I could get him… I could feel his hand hit the top of my shorts; he applied a little bit of pressure by pushing his palm down on my mound… I was on fire and I didn’t know if he could sense it or not.
I never felt like this before…. I never knew just petting could make me feel so good.
I was lightheaded.
I knew I was getting a tad wet but I was trying to keep it together.
I could hear whimpering, it was coming from me.
It was then that Eric chose to kiss me. He took my lips between his teeth and sucked on them a long lingering moment and then I felt his tongue ask for entrance into my mouth. I opened my mouth a bit and his tongue was having a war with my mouth, his tongue was everywhere.
I was becoming dizzy to his touch, to his ministrations; I never wanted it to end.
If ever there was a body on fire it was mine.
I wanted to explode and I wasn’t even having intercourse.
I could feel Eric moving his hand back up my body to my breasts and I didn’t care as long as he was touching something.
But it was then that I felt something else touching my mound. His manhood was rocking over my lady bits and it was out of this world. This man knew what he was doing.
Oh My God, he was huge. To say he had a gracious plenty I would be under estimating him.
I felt him pushing against my female parts harder and harder. If it felt this good without him being inside me I could only imagine what it would feel like with full penetration.
I grabbed his ass and moaned again. He had a great ass.
I pushed him closer. I needed him closer…
I then heard him growl and he nipped my chin and said, “He needed me.” I looked into his eyes and saw lust, a shit load of lust and I was hoping he would see the same in mine.
I looked up at him and told him I needed him too and I didn’t even realize I said it but it came out anyway. “I Love You Eric with all my heart.”
He looked at me and smiled and said “I know, I Love you too Sookie.”
It was then that he pressed a little harder on my mound and I exploded.
I don’t know what caused me to do it but I latched onto his neck and bit down and tasted his blood as I exploded with my orgasm.
I guess his release was escalating too; he sank his fangs into my neck and drank my blood, he rocked a little harder on my lady bits and exploded in his pants.
It was sensual, it was erotic. He was MINE.
As I looked up into his face he was smirking and told me I was his girl and always would be no matter what happen between us.
I closed my eyes real quick to take in his words but when I opened them again he was fading away.
He was telling me goodbye, until we meet again and to stay positive we would be meeting again.
I closed my eyes again but when I opened them back up Dad was standing over me trying to get me to wake up by saying my name softy.
AH hell I was still in Eric’s room.
[End of dream]
I was embarrassed but Dad didn’t push it. He just told me that dinner was ready and he would keep my secret of where he found me.
I was sooooo grateful.
It was two days before Christmas and Mom said she got an urgent phone call from Alcide late last night. They were trying to get a flight out Christmas Eve day so that they would be home for Christmas. They were able to book one seat but they needed three. The “Three Musketeers” were even trying to fly into another city and drive here. But not to get our hopes up in case it fell through. Jason spoke up and said that if it fell through he had a plane flight out to California for the day after Christmas so that he could spend some time with Pam. He knew she would be working during part of his two week vacation but he was okay with that. He had plenty of time saved up with the Perish.
Well Christmas came and went and no visitors. They couldn’t pull it off so as a surprise Mom called Pam up Christmas day to tell her to be at the airport tomorrow at such and such a time and a package would be waiting for her at the Southwest ticket booth. She thought for sure Gran was shipping pies out to them but Pam said she wouldn’t push to find out what it was.
We were all excited for Jason, he was going to see his girl and Gran was afraid he wasn’t going to come home. She figured this was his chance to stay with Pam but he assured her that they weren’t ready for that move yet. Plus she already lived with two other guys, why would she need a third.
Everyone laughed but me. I didn’t understand what was going on but no one bothered to try and explain either. I was a bit upset but I figured I would pull Jason aside later and find out what he meant.
Well that moment never came but when Jason landed and met Pam at the ticket booth she screamed loud enough to get everyone’s attention. Jason said there were flash bulbs going off for a good five minutes. Pam told him to keep his head down and she would get them out of there quickly. I wasn’t sure why Pam was trying to get him out of the airport so quickly but I guess she had her reasons.
It was about a week later that Janice and I went to Walgreens once again, it was so we could pick up supplies for our return to LSU. As always I was drawn to the RAG magazines and I was shocked to see that Pam Ravenscroft was found cheating on Eric Northman. She apparently picked up her “Boy Toy” at the airport and she has been shacked up with him ever since his arrival. It was stated that Eric Northman was in Vegas at the time of this happening so he was unaware of her shenanigans.
Oh My God she is cheating on, she can’t be. Eric must have broken up with her or something why would he put up with her cheating on him?
I knew I was a little on the naive side but never about something like this.
I showed the magazine to Janice and she chuckled. She said do you honestly think Eric would allow his girlfriend to shack up with someone in his own home. He would have kicked her out on her ass like that Dawn Green bitch.
I had to agree, something wasn’t sitting right about this whole thing but I couldn’t put my finger on it. I would figure it out later but keep my eye on the RAGS; they did have a little bit of truth to them.
It was a few days later and Jason came home before we left for school , he said he had a great time with Pam and they didn’t have to leave the house to go swimming because Eric had a pool at the house and they could sun their selves naked if they wanted to no-one else was home.
I told him I was jealous of him for being able to get sun in the winter time.
As we left for school, Janice driving this time, Jason left for Bon Temps. Gran said she was going to stay for another week as they were trying to convince the grandbabies to come home for a at least a week before they were unable to get a break from their jobs… She said she didn’t know if that was going to happen because their work load was picking up in the next week or so.
I wished her luck and we headed for school. I spoke with her a couple of weeks later and the only grandbaby she was able to get home for a couple of weeks was Pam. Pam ended staying in Bon Temps with her and Jason. I was happy for Jason he finally met someone that was a good match for him and she made him happy.
Now if only I could find that special one. I knew Gran told me to get on with my life and live it but I wanted Eric desperately in my life. I felt he was the one I should be with and waiting for. But I knew in my head that that might never happen. I am sure people would think I lost my rockers and needed to be put away for my talking’s I did with Eric every day.
I was always curious about how he really felt. I knew he knew me as Miss Stackhouse from the trial but did he ever connect me to Sookie from the picture? Oh wait maybe he know me as Sookie from the picture and didn’t connect me to Miss Stackhouse?
HMMM I wonder which it was.
Well mid-terms past by and we settled into our routines.
In just two more weeks “Blood Moon” would be starting its new season and I was stoked, so were the girls. I noticed lately that Tara and Amelia were always whispering with Janice but I figured it had to do with Amelia’s drama in some way. She stayed away from me this year, I had heard through the grapevine (Tara) that she was having problems with Tray and was trying to work them out long distance. I was cool with that. He was good for her, he was always able to calm her down and pull her under control when she got a wild hair up her butt. I was hoping that they would be a couple after we graduated. Tray loved her a lot. But if she kept her BS flowing it was possible he would tell her adios. I would pray for her that it all worked out.
School was going by quickly and Claudine was getting more nervous by the minute, since she was graduating in three months time. She would already have a job when she graduated but she was still nervous about her grades.
We told her that “Blood Moon” was started in a week so she could lose herself in the show for one day a week and fantasize all she wanted to, we would be right there with her.
Sunday night was here and we were primed and ready for the show. There was more of a following in our now and we had more girls huddled in the lounge than the year before, so we told them the rules. If you are going to watch with us, everyone needs to be quiet while the show is on. We can talk after the show ends. Claudine piped in and said that she heard through a spoiler that there was going to be something in the credits for the fans so we needed to be quiet until it was completely over.
Well the first show came on and it started with Alcide’s pack. The girls were swooning and Janice just rolled her eyes. I never noticed it before but she chuckled at their high jinx’s. It was rather funny. But what got me the most were the comments when Eric came on the show. I was ticked off and Janice noticed and she took a hold of my hand and squeezed it. I knew I had no room to be jealous but I was and Janice knew it. She was a good friend.
Well at the end of the show there was a message from the Executives.
Thank you to all the loyal fans.
We hope for your continued support of the show.
To another great year.
Break a Leg to the cast of BM!
Well that was nice; I wonder what the others would be like and what episode would Eric have his.
A few more weeks went by and while we were watching the show I let out a gasp… On the screen was a huge bed with furs on it. Just like the one in my dream… Oh my god… I had never seen that bed before, but there it was. Janice asked me if I was okay and I told her yes I would explain later.
I spoke to Janice later about the bed of furs and she was in shock that I had dreamed about it before I had ever seen it (Déjà Vu) but she was even more shocked at how sensual my dream was. Yeah I have fantasies about Eric all the time but never anything like the dream I had.
As the show season progressed we got into waiting for each episode to end so that we could see what the cast had to say, it was fun to see what each cast member had to say; we saw thank yous from Ginger, Jessica, Mark and tonight’s episode was Sophie-Ann. It was really nice they were doing this for us and them. I was told that they messages would be a thank you to fans or a message to someone in particular it was up to the cast member. That was pretty cool. I wonder who thought of it.
It was April now and we were mid way through the season of Blood Moon but we also had spring break next week and it meant there were two episodes we could either watch as our group or watch at home with our loved ones. Well we chose unanimously to watch it as a group so that meant leaving on Monday instead of Saturday and coming back early enough the next Sunday so we wouldn’t miss it.
WE were a bunch of fan girls, what can I say.
So here we were on episode six and I was so dreamy eyed over Eric parts in this episode that I almost missed Pam’s Message.
I Read the following
The Cast & Crew would like to dedicate all of this year’s Episodes to LIFE not DEATH.
To the “Three Musketeers”, WE ROCK.
To Sookie, I’m sorry about your car.
Jason you are my heart.
Like I said I almost missed it.
But could Pam really be talking about Jason and me. I didn’t see anyone looking at me when I gasped so I figured it wasn’t me.
Because of the car comments I have to think on it.
Because of the “Three Musketeer” comment I have to think on it.
Jason went to California for Christmas, maybe it was the Pam and Eric that came to the H’s house.
Cheese and Biscuits…..
I had to figure this out… I would look pretty damn stupid if I didn’t have this figured out… I knew Alcide was one in the same but Pam and Eric I was still doubtful on.
Oh my lord what was I going to do.
What should I think?
Should I confide in Janice yet…. I didn’t know what to do.
So instead of talking to anyone I just got up and went to my dorm room. NO one followed me so I looked out the window and talked to Eric…. I told him I was confused, I needed his guidance and then the next thing I knew it was morning, I had falling asleep.
But I can tell you I had a dream, not a sensual one, just one of us talking and I remember every damn word of it.
[Flashback to dream]
“Hello Sookie, how are you doing?”
“Oh Eric is this really you.”
“Yes it’s me.”
“Why are you here? Now?”
“You needed me so I came to you, you are so confused and I can feel it.”
“Can I ask you some questions?”
“Baby, you can ask me anything.”
Ummm, this is harder than I thought. Here it goes….
“Eric are you the same Eric that my Gran, Mom and Dad know?”
“Sookie, what do you think? What does your heart and your head tell you?”
“That you are the same.”
“So then why are you being so stubborn and fighting what you know to be true and not asking about it?”
“I am afraid I am wrong and it will hurt me more to find out that I am wrong.”
“Baby listen to me. You were hurt by Quinn; I am not Quinn, I am not the same type of person as him. We, me and you, may be apart because of distance but you mean a great deal to me. Will we ever meet, that I am uncertain of, but in my heart I know that FATE will knit us together. Even if we are just meant to meet quickly and then separate then that is what will happen.”
“But Eric I want more than that.”
“Oh sweet girl, I know you do and so do I but when we first meet it will be earth shattering but it might be short lived…. I know this in my head as well as my heart. I have my career and you have your school.”
“But Eric I need you desperately.”
“Baby be strong, we have so many years ahead of us. Why rush it. You are meant to finish school and start your career as a teacher; I will not stand in your way of your dreams. I am still meant to be an actor and right now I am so busy I never have much time for myself let alone a new relationship. For right now it is not time for us to be in a committed relationship. I know these words are hard but it is truth.”
“I know I sound like I am whining and maybe I am but why can’t we be in a relationship when we meet.”
“Sookie, listen to my words I know it will be hard for you to understand, but listen to them. Can you do that for me please.”
“I need you to live your life, I need you to dream and reach your goals. I need you to stretch out beyond your comfort zone and meet new people and if that means another man then so be it. I know it will not hurt you and me in the end but I do not want you sitting around pining away for me. Live, Love and Enjoy.”
“No buts my sweet girl….. You have permission to meet and date… as I am sure you know I will be doing the same but the relationships will not mean anything to me. This is a part of your growth process. You need this Sookie do not shelter yourself. Live. Enjoy and Love…”
“Eric you are confusing me more… In one breath you are telling me we will meet and in another you are telling me to find another.”
“Sookie, I have met my fair share of women and I have dated my share too. I will not lie to you about this. But you on the other hand have only ever dated one man and I need you to experience more before we are truly together. It’s my gift to you. Live and Enjoy…. Fulfill yourself … experience the world. You living life will not keep us from meeting or eventually being together. My world is a very complicated place; the life of an actor is under scrutiny all the time. I need you to go out there and experience life so that you will be better prepared for our life together. That might not happen for years but I know if you grow and enjoy your life you will be better suited for what is ahead.”
‘I understand but I am not happy about it.”
“I see in your eyes there is something else, what is it baby?”
“UMMM do you think when we do meet that we can talk on the phone or text or email or something so that we don’t lose one another?”
“I would like that; I think it can be arranged. Besides Gran and Jason already have all the phone number you need.”
“I need to go Sookie; it’s time for you to wake up for so you can head for Shreveport. Know that I love you and you are always in my thoughts and heart.”
“I love you too, please don’t leave me.”
“I must baby, it’s time but know that I am always with you as long as you wear the survivor necklace.”
“I never take it off.”
“I know, until next time.”
[End of Dream]
I woke up feeling better about everything…. I knew deep down that everything would be all right. That Eric and Pam were my Eric and Jason’s Pam. I knew that I had to wait until the family was all together to bring it up and to let them know that I knew. I just didn’t know if I should bring it up during spring break or wait until school was over. I had the five hour trip home to make up my mid.
I was quiet when Janice came by my room to pick me up. She asked me if I was okay and I told her I had a lot on my mind, I asked her if she minded if I didn’t talk to her much on the way home; I had some things to figure out. She said she was cool with it.
Janice was a lifesaver as far as allowing me to keep quiet for the five hour journey home. I was in a funk but a good funk and I figured out by about two or so hours in I would wait until we broke for the end of the school year to ask all my questions. Besides it would give me time to come up with a list of questions if I needed to. Plus I wanted both Gran and Jason there but I knew I wouldn’t be seeing Jason this trip around. I also didn’t want to end my school year on a sour note. After we got back I had a few more weeks before finals and I needed to do well on my finals. My grades weren’t slacking but I wanted to finish off with a high grade point average.
Spring back went quickly; Gran only came up for a couple of days as she was preparing her home so that she could spend most of the summer at the Herveaux’s. I truly didn’t know what that meant but I knew I would find out soon enough.
We left early Sunday morning so we could get back in time for the show. Mom and Dad just laughed at us about why we needed to leave so early but a pact was a pact. We made it in plenty of time for the show and we had a great time with everyone. The message was from one of the other cast member but Isabel’s message was pretty cool, she thanked her MOM for bringing her into this world.
We had another three weeks before finals so we had all cracked down on our down time. I had given some thought to talking to the family about what I figured out on my own but I didn’t know how to bring it up so I figured I would play it by ear.
Claudine’s graduation was awesome. She was so nervous but she graduated as Valedictorian I was so proud of her. Her family came to the graduation even Claude, he gave me a big hug and kiss and told me he would hang out with me anytime. I just laughed at him, he was too funny and not my type. We said our goodbyes as she cleaned out her part of the dorm room and security stopped by to let me know I would have a new dorm mate next year. I was nervous as to whom it was but Catherine came flying into the room a short time later to tell me she would be my dorm mate next year.
I was looking forward to it.
The final two weeks in my dorm room were quiet but I loved every minute of it. It helped me be able to study quietly without having to go to the library.
It was now the week of finals and I got another jolt from the current “Blood Moon” episode. I had already known about Alcide but it solidified everything in my mind about what was going on. I knew I had to talk to the family so I decided after the show was over I would call Gran and make arrangements to have her and Jason at the Herveaux’s after I arrived there in one weeks time.
What Alcide said for his message:
Gran you introduced me to History and Literature. I introduced you to Blood Moon.
Thank you for helping me to believe in True Love. You’re still my number one girl.
Love You Alcide
To Angela, You are my heart Alc.
I spoke with Gran and let her know that I needed to call a family meeting and I wanted to know how soon after Janice and I got back to the Herveaux’s house that she thought her and Jason could come up to Shreveport. She told me Jason was planning on being there the third weekend of May since Pam was flying in to come visit for a month or so. I told her that was fine but I needed to make sure everyone was there. She told that was no problem since she needed to talk to me too.
Well that got me to thinking maybe she was going to get with me about the same thing… Maybe they all figured it was time to tell me what they knew.
If so then they could start the conversation and not me.
Well Friday came quickly and finals went well; I was very nervous because if I didn’t do well on a couple of the finals I was pretty sure I would finish with C’s in a couple of classes. I would have to wait and see when our grades were posted online. I was hoping for straight B’s.
Dad drove up on Friday night and met with early Saturday morning; he came up with the truck to take our refrigerators back to the house. We didn’t want them disappearing on us over the summer.
As usual Janice and I talked and sang on our way back to the house. We had a great time. We were about two hours into the drive when I told Janice I called a family meeting but it wouldn’t take place until Jason and Gran could be there. She said that was cool… She heard Alcide and Pam would be there the last week of May so if it was okay they could be involved too.
I told her that was cool but I didn’t know how much Pam would know about what I needed to talk to everyone about. I figured Alcide knew enough to participate.
All Janice said is you would be surprised.
We arrived at the house to a big lunch and a big hug from Mom. She was great. I couldn’t remember a lot about my mom, she died when I was so young so Sabrina was a good fit for me and I was happy she was in my life and she wanted to be there.
Dad told us to go wash up he would unload the car for us. He was so sweet to do this for me/us, he also was a godsend to my life and I needed to let the Herveaux’s know this when we had the family talk.
We relaxed the rest of the day and when we had supper that evening I let Mom and Dad know that I called a family meeting. It would happen after Jason and Gran got her the last week of May. They said not a problem that Alcide and Pam would be arriving on Sunday evening about 7pm, we could have it then. I asked her if it was okay if we waited until after 9pm so that we could watch the last episode of “Blood Moon.”
She chuckled and said of course dear we wouldn’t have it any other way. I told her thank you, plus I wanted to make sure if that was Eric’s night to do his message I wouldn’t miss it. There were only two shows left of the season so I had a fifty/fifty chance of which Sunday it was.
The two weeks went by quickly and the anticipation of Alcide and Pam’s arrival was unbearable. I knew why I was nervous, but I couldn’t figure out why everyone else was. It put me on edge. Eric’s message seemed to be slated for the last episode, best for last and all that….. Or would his be next year… damn not a good thought to have right now.
They arrived about 8pm,it was Jason who picked them up so I couldn’t even talk to him about everything before the family meeting.
As soon as they arrived Alcide gave me a big bear hug and kiss on the cheek.
Pam gave me a hug and said she was happy to finally meet me and now she knows what all the fuss was all about.
I wasn’t too sure what that meant but Dad told everyone that they needed to get cleaned up, we were watching the last episode of “Blood Moon” at 9pm and then we were having a family meeting after it and everyone was requested to be there.
Everyone nodded yes and we all dispersed. It was like watching cockroaches run for the hills when you turn the light on at night.
I know ewww right.
The show was awesome, it left so many cliffhangers and need to knows but we would have to wait until next year to find out what would happen next. I saw Pam staring at me and it made me nervous but I averted my eyes back to the TV screen and there it was the message from Eric. I swear it was in slow motion so that I could read all of it. Or Dad hit pause so that I could read all it.
To Miss Stackhouse,
on being a survivor and making IT.
You are in my dreams
I gasped and said very loud.
Oh my lord he doesn’t know.
I heard Pam say, “He doesn’t know what?”
But I ignored here as I went into deep thought. Know what was I suppose to do?
Well I couldn’t dwell for long, it was meeting time. I was nervous and everyone was looking at me so I just blurted it out.
I know, I know everything.
I have known since last August and I am okay with you not telling me that Eric is my Eric and Jason’s Pam is the show’s Pam.
Quick like pulling off a band-aid I was spilling information out of my mouth…. For the next 20 minutes I told them everything I knew and when I figured it out and how I had suspected this or that but I put them into the back of my head, Déjà Vu was nerve racking to me at times.
But the one thing I needed to know did Eric know and if so for how long?
Well Dad was the one to talk. He told me that he was the one who figured everything out and one by one brought everyone one into the fold including Eric who also found out last August. He explained why they didn’t tell me and their reasons behind it. They all wanted us together but they didn’t want to interfere and make our relationship like an arranged marriage. I nodded my head that I understood but…
I told them all, I could be pissed at them for this and hold a grudge for the rest of my life or I can face the fact that I needed to stop being so naïve and grow up and that is exactly what I was doing from this point out. But if they ever did something like this again it would not go so well.
They all agreed that it would not happen again, full disclosure from then on out.
So that led Gran into what she wanted to talk about.
She said I was not allowed to work this summer I was taking it off and she was going to give me the money that I needed for the next school year of expenses.
I told her over my dead body and everyone laughed.
“Child, I have more than enough money to take care of you properly for once and you are going to allow me to do this. That is why I am going to be spending most of the summer here with you instead of us going back to Bon Temps. My house is still being renovated and I don’t need to be there while it happens, Jackson’s company is handling it and we would go look at it in July when it was finally finished.”
I just looked at her and said, “But I have to let Sam know.”
“Sook, I already told Sam you wouldn’t be there this summer and he already made arrangements to fill your time with some of the other waitresses. He said he was proud of you for taking the time off.”
“Gran, how can you afford it?’
“Well child, I get a hefty allowance every month and I just can’t spend it alone.”
“Gran, how are you getting and allowance.”
I heard it all in unison from all of them.
I was shocked and just nodded okay. Now what was I suppose to do? I felt like a kept woman.
Pam spoke up and said, “Well Sookie if you need helping spending Eric’s money I can certainly help you with that.”
I laughed at her and said that would not be happening.
The next few weeks were interesting to say the least; we spent a lot of time at the H’s.
We went shopping for some new furniture for my room and the living room, Gran had held off until I had gotten home so that I could help pick it out since the house would be mine when she passed. She said she had already let Jason know that she wanted the house to be giving to me upon her death and she would leave a nice chunk of money for him so it would even out. He told her since he had our parent’s home that it was all good for him… Plus he and Pam were adding some additions onto his house as well so he was good.
That’s when it hit me. Jason and Pam were really a couple.
Damn, oh shit, last Christmas when I read the RAGS about Pam cheating on Eric it was actually Jason and Pam staying with Eric.
Was I stupid or what?
It was coming up to the end of June, Gran and Mom pulled me to the side to let me know they were planning something special for my birthday celebration.
Was there anyone I could think of that I wanted to attend? It would be happening at the Herveaux’s, July 4th weekend.
I told them I would like Tara, Amelia, Holly from Bon Temps and Maria, Claudine and Catherine from LSU.
They said that was not a problem since they had already invited them and their beaus for the weekend. It might be a little packed at the house but everyone could double up if needed. They told me even Alcide’s Angela was coming for the celebration.
I thanked them but I knew there was only one person I wanted there but I knew he was in Canada filming and couldn’t be here. Sigh
That led to Gran gasping and saying, “oh child I forgot to tell you something and I don’t want you to get mad at your friends but Amelia and Tara know about everyone, they have since last August. They happened upon Eric and me the day he brought me home and the day they went back to LSU for school. I made them swear not to tell you. Please don’t be mad at them.”
“Gran, I am not mad at them, it now makes sense why they had these big ass grins on their faces that day and why Amelia avoided me like the plague.”
Seriously I was okay with it. So much had happened, I was beginning to see so many little things that I missed before and I should have caught on a long time ago. Stupid me.
Well it was the week of my birthday.
Pam never went back to California she planned to stay the summer with my brother. It was a surprise for him. She said they needed to know if they could make it as a long term couple and live together.
So far so good.
Alcide was excited that Angela showed up two days ago and everyone loved her. Once she noticed me it clicked for her where she knew me from and from then on out we were inseparable, plus she said I could wear my polka dot bikini again.
I was in heaven; Pam even told me that I could wear it for her anytime.
Everyone chuckled at her, but I think she was definitely serious about it. I knew Pam liked girls but she was with my brother and he was okay with it. So who am I to judge?
It was finally Saturday and everyone started to show up. Dad and Alcide kept disappearing at different intervals saying they needed to pick stuff up for later so who was I to make waves on what was going on. They wanted me to be surprised at all their doings that I just let it happen.
The only thing Alcide did ask me for was for me to wear my daisy dukes with my polka dot bikini. I thought it was an odd request but Angela told me to go for it, she was okay with his request.
So that’s exactly what I was wearing for my party.
I went outside to greet my friends and they said they were all happy to be there. Tara and Amelia asked me if there were any hard feelings and I told them absolutely not, we were solid.
I was called back into the kitchen to help Gran and Mom. Janice and Pam were in there too, they were all up to something but I just couldn’t figure out what. My back was turned to the kitchen door prepping a pickle tray so I didn’t see who walked in.
That’s when I heard it; a familiar male voice.
They all said hello and I took a deep breath and turned around slowly.
It was Eric.
I knew I should not have done what I did next but it was pure reflex.
I squealed like a stuck pig and ran over to him and jumped into his arms.
His arms opened up immediately and wrapped around me like a warm blanket and I cried and laughed at the same time.
He was here, he was really here and he came for my birthday.
But for how long was he here for?
I breathed breathlessly, “Eric you’re here?”
I heard back just as breathlessly, “Yes sweet girl I am here for you.”
I kissed him on the cheek and we both blushed.
When I looked around everyone was out of the kitchen but us.
When did they leave?
Or for how long had we been standing there?
“Eric why are we alone?”
“Because I asked them to leave us alone if our greeting went well.”
Hmmmm, in my mind I pumped my fist and said WOOT WOOT……
Author’s Note: I know its long but imagine what it would have been like if I keep this chapter and the previous one together. I seriously considered breaking it down into three chapters but I figured what the hell two it is. Hope you enjoy it, KY